19日奥巴马The Tonight Show, 18/16日说辞视频 汇集美国各大晚间脱口秀中一些搞笑Monologue, 时事性新闻性外加些美国幽默。
March 18, 2009
"President Obama is very upset with AIG. He said the problems at AIG were caused by greed, to which AIG said, 'Well, what do you think the 'G' stands for? Hello!'" --Jay Leno
“奥巴马总统对AIG非常失望。他说AIG的僵局是由于贪婪(Greed)造成的，AIG对此表态说，'那么，你以为我们这个AIG的G代表什么哪？醒醒吧！ ” -杰·雷诺
"AIG, which already received $170 billion in taxpayers' money, paid $165 million in bonuses. But they say the bonuses are justified because the company made an extra $170 billion last year." --Jay Leno
“AIG收了1700亿美元纳税人的钱，却发放1.65亿美元奖金。但是他们说，奖金是合理的，因为该公司去年额外赚了1700亿美元。 ” -杰·雷诺
"Earlier this week, Republican Senator Charles Grassley of Iowa said that AIG executives should follow the Japanese model by publicly apologizing and then doing one of two things — either resign or kill themselves. But why not have them resign, then kill themselves on pay per view, huh? That would raise enough money to pay off everybody they screwed." --Jay Leno
“本周早些时候，来自爱荷华的共和党参议员查尔斯格拉斯利说，AIG高管们应按照日本的方式，公开道歉，然后要么辞职要么自杀。但我们为什么不让他们先辞职，然后让他们自杀，并在付费频道实况转播哪？这样的话，可以筹到足够的钱，支付给他们的受害者。“ -杰·雷诺
"George Bush is writing a book. No, that's not the joke. It's a serious book about the 12 toughest decisions he made as President. It's called 'The Ten Toughest Decisions I Made As President.' It's a good book. It's a pop-up book."--Jimmy Fallon
“乔治布什在写一本书。不，这不是玩笑。这是一本正儿八经的书，写他任总统期间他做出的12个最难作出的决定。书名是《我当总统时做出十大最艰难的决定》，一本很好的书。是一本儿童立体动画书。“ -吉米·法伦
"I want to go to Papa Jong's, the new North Korean pizzeria. It is going to be good. The delivery policy at the North Korean pizzeria is a little different. If the pizza is not there in 30 minutes or less, the driver gets executed."--Jimmy Fallon
“我想去新开的北朝鲜的比萨店，叫‘Papa Jong's’。味道会不错的。这家北朝鲜比萨店的外送政策稍有不同。如果比萨饼在30分钟之内没送到的话，送外卖的会被处死。“ -吉米·法伦
[译者注：美国有家比萨连锁店叫Papa Johns(琼斯老爹，或爸爸穷死)，在中国也许考虑到爸爸穷死不好，改叫棒!约翰，这里叫Papa Jong's, 取金正日Kim Jong-il中一字]
"In worthless drain on taxpayer money news, insurance giant AIG. is on the hot seat because after they took billions of dollars in bailout money, they gave $165 million out in bonuses to their executives. So now, lawmakers are demanding that they give the money back. The problem, though, is that legally they're entitled to the money so it's a dilemma. But I have an idea I think might satisfy all of us and also adhere to the letter of the law. I say, instead of mailing the bonus checks to their houses, we put rocks on them and we put them at the bottom of an enormous piranha tank. We set it up in the middle of Times Square. You want the money, swim. There it is." --Jimmy Kimmel
“在那则关于无谓消耗纳税人钱的消息中，保险业巨头又坐上了热板凳，因为他们拿了数十亿美元的政府救援资金后，给AIG高管们发放了一点六五亿美元的奖金。所以现在，国会议员们纷纷要求他们把奖金给退回来。问题是，在法律上他们有权得到那笔奖金，因此造成了一个两难的处境。但是我有一个办法，我想可以令所有人满意，同时遵守法律条文。我的办法是，不要将奖金支票邮寄到他们的家里，我们把奖金支票绑在石块上，再将石块沉在一个巨大的水虎鱼鱼缸的底部。将鱼缸放在纽约时报广场的正中间。你想要钱吗，游进去拿啊。这就是我想出来的好办法。“ -吉米·金梅尔
[译者注：水虎鱼，有人说狼吞虎咽，水虎鱼笑了，知道为啥吗]
March 16, 2009
"In fact, you know what AIG stands for? Anybody know? Adventures In Greed." --Jay Leno
“事实上，你知道AIG这三个字母代表什么吗？有人知道吗？(Adventures In Greed)贪婪中冒险。” -杰·雷诺
"It's past midnight. So it's officially St. Patrick's Day, everybody! But here in New York, it's tough. It's tough, with the economy struggling. In fact, the drinks are so expensive, no one can afford to throw up anymore." --Jimmy Fallon
“现在过了子夜12点。所以，圣帕特里克节了，各位！但在纽约这里，情况很糟糕。很糟糕，经济实在不景气。事实上，酒实在太贵了，没有人能呕吐得起了。“ -吉米·法伦
这里有 Jay Leno 的 The Tonight Show 09.3.18 单口独白 的部分视频：
这里有 Jay Leno 的 The Tonight Show 09.3.16 单口独白 的部分视频：
这里有 Jay Leno 的 The Tonight Show 09.3.19 与奥巴马聊天的视频：
【本文翻译仅为外语学习及阅读目的，原文作者个人观点与译者及译言网无关】
